On Your Relationship With Your Brother (Letter 14)

black-brothersDear Y.B.M.:

Maybe as young boys you and your brother or brothers fought and often times did not get along as brothers should. But you will find that, as you grow older, the relationship can grow to become one of the most special on earth. Your relationship can turn out to the point where you are more than just brothers; you can become very close friends. Here are some ideas to help enhance that relationship and keep it growing:

1. Remember that even though you are brothers you are both independent and more different than you think.

2. Genuinely respect your brother’s differences and opinions. Let him be him and you be you. For example, when my little brother got married, I shared something with him, but, I was quick to tell him that he had to put his twist on what I had shared with him.

3. Do not compete against your brother. That is asinine activity. Forget this stuff called sibling rivalry. Just do your best in whatever field you are in, and encourage him to do his best in his field.

4. Be completely candid in all of your dealings with your brother. He knows when you are putting on. He knows better than most when you are not being real.

5. Stay in touch, but not too much. Give him time and room to grow.

6. Challenge and encourage him to do better and greater things with his life, and to strive for spiritual gain instead of material gain.

7. Most of all, love him unconditionally, and stick by him through the good times and the bad times. Don’t be condemning, rather be encouraging.

Other than my relationship with my wife, I do not think I have had a more close family relationship than with my brother, Mark. Even though my brother and I are not as close as we used to be, I enjoyed those times we used to spend together. It was amazing how even though we were years apart in age, we saw the world basically in the same way. I wish that you and your brother would share such a relationship for at least some time in your adult life.

With Brotherly Love,

Daniel

P.T. (Power Thoughts):

Astrid Alauda said, “There’s no other love like the love for a brother. There’s no other love like the love from a brother.”

Mark Brown said, “Sometimes being a brother is even better than being a superhero.”

St. Francis of Assisi said, “Blessed is the servant who loves his brother as much when he is sick and useless as when he is well and can be of service to him. And blessed is he who loves his brother as well when he is afar off as when he is by his side, and who would say nothing behind his back he might not, in love, say before his face.”

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